The Winter Message You May Not Want to Hear

Happy 2023!

We’re 12 days into a new year. What’s 2023 feel and look like in your life?

My 2023 is already giving me a message I didn’t want to hear this week.

SLOW down and OFFER yourself FREEDOM TODAY and everyday. Be S.O.F.T. AF with yourself by any means necessary, boo!!!! Remember the commitment you made to yourself on New Year’s Day about being S.O.F.T. AF with yourself in your life, relationships, and career? Why are you putting pressure on yourself to add more things to your to-do list in your business?

I resisted this message because I got caught up in what I thought I should be doing in my business after watching peers roll out their 2023 programs and offers. I got caught up in comparing myself to others. I forgot all about my heart-centered approach of Thriving Mindfully that has guided me for the past 30+ years.

YES I FORGOT ABOUT IT because I allowed my mind to get caught up in comparing myself to others which never works and always creates pressure and stress I don’t deserve. HAVE YOU EVER DONE THAT?

On Wednesday morning, I got up early to go walking with my soul sistalove and fellow Howard University Law alumna, Tonya. As we walked and talked, I found myself sharing what Spirit and my loving + wise + well ancestors have been calling me to do during this Winter season. I told Tonya I needed to press the reset button on my 2023 and recommit to my S.O.F.T. AF practice because I am experiencing a new chapter of emotional awareness and maturity as a 58 year old. In astrology, my new chapter is called the second Saturn Return.

My second Saturn Return is calling me to slow down, pay attention, and be open to change in how I show up in my life, relationships, career, and business. It is asking me to explore how I can begin to walk out my calling as a wise woman (elder). It is inviting me to feel and examine all of my feelings. It is also asking me to strengthen my TRUST in Spirit, my loving + wise + well ancestors, and myself.

Honestly speaking, some of these things are scary and feel like they will be messy at times. I know they will bring me into a place of unknown. And it is the unknown that has parts of me — my Inner Critic and Chief Operating Officer archetypes — freaking out some. Why? Because it means I will have to surrender and lose control.

There it is … the C-WORD. CONTROL. Loss of control triggers my Inner Critic and Chief Operating Office archetypes. Together, they are control freak powerhouses who can get so loud in my mind with comparison, overdoing, and overachieving that they create the pressure to perform which gives birth to stress. They are the ones who refuse to SLOW down. They want no part of my S.O.F.T. AF reset.

In the midst of their resistance, I was able to claim and celebrate three blessings that have guided me back to my commitment to be S.O.F.T. AF this winter.

MY 3 BLESSINGS

Blessing #1 is rooted in my birthright of mindfulness and relationship with my inner self, Spirit, and the loving + wise + well ancestors. Over the past 30+ years, I have chosen to slow down and pay attention to what’s happening inside and outside of me. That choice represents me claiming and practicing my birthright of mindfulness. When I practice it, I have been able to know and understand myself from the insight out. It is a lifelong journey of self-discovery that happens each time I SLOW DOWN and OFFER myself FREEDOM TODAY and everyday. The FREEDOM gives birth to clarity that helps me make a healthier choice like pressing the reset button on my 2023 commitment to be S.O.F.T. AF with myself.

Blessing #2 is moving my body when I feel pressure and stress. Walking with my soulsistalove Tonya in the cold weather this week helped shake up and release some of the pressure and stress I was feeling in my mind and body.

Blessing #3 is making myself vulnerable in a safe community. Being able to share what I was feeling with my soul sistalove Tonya during our walk really helped me gain clarity and support. I also shared my feelings with my soul brothalove and accountability partner Meico during our dinner. Having a community of chosen folks I can talk to and share things gives me support and space to speak my TRUTH.

If you want to hear more about my S.O.F.T. AF journey and how I am using it to embrace being 58, tune into the BRAND NEW Thriving Mindfully Podcast Season 6.

The first episode focuses on trusting and nurturing yourself during the winter with mindful self-care that is rooted in traditional Chinese Medicine, astrology, and numerology.

LISTEN HERE.

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